First Week Euphoria

I’m having a great week! The first week of making changes is often pretty good. I feel motivated, my body is responding, I feel healthier. I need to remember these feelings when things get tough.

I thought I would talk a bit about my goals. In one of the diet books I read, I believe it was the Beck Solution, it talks about making a list of reasons why you want to lose weight. I did this ages ago, but got the list out again recently and updated it. I’ve been wrestling, recently, with the whole idea of losing weight and why I want to do it. I follow a couple of Fat Acceptance blogs and I appreciate the idea that society has imposed a false sense of beauty and acceptability on us. I truly believe that people who are fat can be healthy, athletic, beautiful and happy. I am trying to accept myself more in light of this. I also know that I am not healthy at the moment – I feel it. I’ve always been very healthy even when I’ve been on the heavier side, but I can feel it in my body that I am not healthy right now. I’m at risk for various diseases and disorders. There are several things that make me uncomfortable and unwell that I know would be dealt with if I lost weight.

My desire is not to be tiny. I’ve never been tiny, but I have been healthy and that’s what I am aiming for. Health is at the top of my list of reasons to lose weight. I have two young sons, ages 6 and 3. I had children at a later age and I need to be as healthy as possible so that I am around to see them grow and hopefully spend time with my grandchildren.

I want to lose 58 pounds. That still puts me in the overweight category, but it’s where I’ve been really comfortable. I’ve been at the high end of “acceptable” weight before and I was quite emaciated. I think I am just a heavy person and I’m ok with that.

There are other reasons that I have as well and I’ll go into some of those later. For now, I am feeling good and strong and able.

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