Days 4, 5, 6 & 7

Ah. The weekend wasn’t the worst, food-wise, but it wasn’t great. Then, yesterday, was completely sucky. I broke every “rule”, completely ignored my cues and felt miserable. When will I learn that food won’t really make me feel any better about life or myself?

Again, I am confronted by friends and people I know who are dieting and losing weight. I have a friend who starts Medifast tomorrow. It is so appealing to me. Just do something drastic to get a jump-start and then start eating intuitively. I want to have quick results. I know that it doesn’t work for me though. It is incredibly tempting.

It’s warming up here and so this morning I had the distinct displeasure of trying on shorts and capris. Hardly anything fit. Things that last year were fine. Sigh. So frustrating. I have so many fabulous clothes that I can’t wear. I love clothes and fashion and I find myself just looking for stuff that is comfy and covers me up.

I have been very sensitive to cues today and it’s tremendously empowering. I enjoy what I eat. It’s such a revolutionary concept if I can just learn to feed my emotional self in other ways besides food.

Anyway, I am feeling hopeful today. This is my life, these are my choices, I have choices. Thankful.

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